Thursday, July 21, 2011

I'm Not Anti-Social, I Just Have A Toddler

I love my rugrat, but I have to admit that sometimes I miss being able to just go out and do some of the things I used to be able to before having a child. It was so much easier to just pick up and take off or make a spur-of-the-moment change in plans. for that matter, it was nice not having to carry around a diaper bag or plan out for food, drinks, and extra clothes each time I leave the house. I know I sort of signed up for this when I had a baby, but some people haven't quite caught on to that.
If you remember the old cartoon "Buttons & Mindy", my son is quickly becoming a Mindy. He is very adventurous and liked to climb, explore, and do things that are really fun for him and scare the crap out of me and most other adults around. He is not one of those children you can just stick in front of a television set and expect to be entranced. Maybe that's where I messed up by not having the TV on much at home, but he would much rather be trying to climb the bookcases, taking all my silverware out of the drawer, emptying the fax machine of paper, putting the dog's food in his water dish, or throwing flour all over the kitchen than watching cartoons.

This makes me more than a little nervous when visiting other people's houses. Some of my friends with children tell me that he'll be fine and that their 6 or 7 year old will keep an eye on him while they play in the kid's room, but I've seen him get into all sorts of stuff in a room full of adults, so I'm not going to count on it. My childless friends also don't get it. He's a social little fellow and will force himself to stay awake just to be around people, so there's no guarantee he'll settle down for a nap at 9 or 10 or 2am so we can have quiet time to talk or watch a movie. It also limits the places I can go. We don't have a sitter, and I'm nervous about leaving him with just anyone. Being that most of my social life before centered around live music, mosh pits, and beer, that cuts out all of that.

It feels so lame being all "sorry, I have a kid now" when an out of town friend calls to tell me his band is playing in the next town over, but the little dude is pretty much with me wherever I go now for the next few years. Until some really cool person decided to open a bar/club with an on-site daycare and book some good bands, it looks like I'll have to decline a lot of invitations. I'm working on meeting other moms around here that "get" this and don't mind hanging out out home where it's not a huge issue if one of the kiddos wants to run around naked or has a meltdown because they are tired or unhappy, but I'm also trying to figure out a way to let my old friend know I'm really not avoiding them, I just have a toddler.
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